Is there hope for resolution between leaders with major conflict? (89-2)

If you have been in leadership long, conflict is a word you understand but dread. I am not talking about a disagreement over certain facts or a misunderstanding because of poor communication or an organizational snafu because of a bad decision, but real conflict. A philosophical difference that goes to the core of two or more individuals that has festered and now has the emotions tangled up with the facts so that every word and action is misunderstood, misinterpreted, and brought under scrutiny to such a degree that there appears to be no way to resolve the conflict. Read 1 Samuel 26.

Saul was the reigning king of Israel. Samuel the prophet had informed Saul that because of his actions of disobedience to God the kingdom would be removed from him and his family line. Saul also knew that Samuel had anointed David to be the future king. And, even though David was not trying to assert himself and “take” the throne, Saul saw David’s every action as a threat to himself and his family. There was real conflict between Saul and David to the point that if Saul had anything to say about it, David would be killed.

We see conflict with this intensity in businesses, ministries, marriages and sometimes between siblings. A paraphrase of a line Billy Graham jestingly spoke at the Alaska Crusade many years ago was that his wife Ruth had never considered divorce but she had considered murder. Billy may have been using his line as humor but at this moment some reading this study may have conflict in their life that runs almost this deep.

So is there any hope for resolution between two leaders with conflict that runs this deep? There is if at least one of the leaders will take initiative per Biblical guidelines and God softens hearts of the people. Leaders can learn from David’s actions toward Saul in 1 Samuel 26:

• David initiated contact with Saul and set the stage for communication (v. 14).
• David appealed to Saul’s sense of right and wrong (vv. 15-16).
• David asked questions and then listened for the King’s “heart response” (v. 18, 21).
• David asked Saul to listen so he could share his perspective (v. 19).
• David owned up to anything he had done wrong (v. 19).
• David offered forgiveness and reconciliation as an act of trust in God (vv. 22-24).

Even if you use a slightly different approach to reconcile a conflict, the key point here is that if leaders will make an effort using principles from God’s Word, there is hope. Effective godly leaders seek resolution rather than continued conflict.